Here is the horrible but honest reality: I struggle with comparison.
For many years it was the embarrassing source of so many mood swings, mild anxiety and stressed-out striving. It hid itself through hard work, high achievement and perfectionism. I did well most of the time because I could find a way to compare myself and come out on top.
But that type of mental gymnastics can only take you so far. And eventually, you are faced with the reality that there are people who are just better than you. They are cleverer than you, more successful than you, more effective than you, and well, you are just left with you.
The imperfect, fearfully, wonderfully made ‘you’ that you are not happy with.
So, what is the next option? The next option is to tap out. ‘If I am not in the race, well, I can’t lose’ is the rationale of that choice.
And so you tap out of the work that God has given to you, you tap out of the spheres that God is shaping you through, and you find the quiet empty spaces where there is only you, yourself, and… you.
No one left to compare with, out of the race, comfortable but ineffective.
And for a season this may be the quiet reflective space that you need but eventually, you will need to start running again. You will need to get back into the race.
I remember a time where I was wrestling hard with the Lord on the topic of comparison. It was during a 3 day prayer retreat and I was walking through the countryside praying and listening to the Lord. I didn’t want wrestle with comparison anymore. I wanted the freedom that He had won for me because surely this wasn’t it.
I believed that there had to be another way, which in itself was a revelation from the Holy Spirit, a whisper from the heart of God that He had a different and better way for me to live. A way that was truly going to be free. I didn’t know how I would get there but I believed that in Him it was possible.
And so I walked and I wrestled. I walked and I listened. I walked and I prayed.
I eventually got to the top of a hill and from that vantage point, I could see all the surrounding hills. I could see the boundaries of each field and the land and property belonging to each farm. In that moment a verse dropped into my spirit and revelation from the Holy Spirit came to me.
‘The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places’ Psalm 16:5
(now I know this psalm is David speaking about God being his portion and cup, and his beautiful inheritance. But hear me out this is the revelation that God gave me through this verse for my situation. The living breathing word will live and breath as He wills.)
In an instant, I understood something about boundaries, territories, stewardship, giftings and comparison that I hadn’t understood before.
I felt the Holy Spirit say ‘Whatever has been assigned to you within your boundary is yours, no one else can take it. But equally so, it is your responsibility to work the land and to use it.’
‘You cannot look across the wall into another territory and wish that you had someone else’s instead because it has not been assigned to you. In the same way, you do not need to compete with other people for your land because they have not been assigned to it. You have.’
It was a clear correction and revelation that brought grounding and clarity. All this time I have been stood in my portion of ‘land’ (be it the spheres of influence I have access to, the gifts and skills I have been given, or the relationships and opportunities I have been entrusted to) and I have been looking over the wall at what everyone else has. I have wanted my portion to look like their portion, even worse I have been so busy comparing my ‘land’ with everyone else’s that I have neglected to do the work that was my responsibility to do. I had been so busy thinking that someone else would be better than me, more equipped than me, more experienced than me… all the while the fields that had been assigned to me lay dormant and uncultivated.
What a waste.
Freedom and repentance came in that moment as I understood truly what it meant to run in my own lane.
There is work guys, and it is not the work that you see everyone else doing everywhere else. It is the work that God has put in front of you right now. Yes, things may look better in someone else’s life, they may look more accomplished, and more successful but you can only be successful if you run in your own lane, if you take the time to cultivate the field that God has assigned to you.
The enemy has come to ‘kill, steal, and destroy1’ and the sad thing is that we often make it very easy for him to do that.
Whilst we are peaking over the proverbial hedge at our neighbour’s field the harvest of our own fields goes to waste, the seeds in our own hands remain unplanted, and our time is wasted until there is no time left.
The whispers of ‘you are not good enough’, ‘how can God use you’, ‘they are so much better than you’ only come from one whose name fits his strategy. He is the accuser of the brethren2.
Comparison is not a strategy that we can overcome by doing some crazy mental gymnastics or by running away and hiding in our own empty room.
Comparison has to be overcome ‘by the blood of the lamb and the word of your testimony’3. It is not a social, psychological issue for the Children of God, it is warfare waged against you by the enemy of your soul. It is warfare that seeks to get you out of the race, comfortable, safe and completely ineffective. It is warfare that seeks to divide the body of Christ and render her unproductive and fruitless.
It’s time to pick up your swords, brothers and sisters.
‘For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.’
- 2 Cor 10:3-6
It is time to live in the freedom that Christ has won for us. It is time to get free from every weight and sin that hinders us.
As I waited for the exact weapon of warfare for this strategy I felt God give me the source verse of Proverbs 3:34. It can be read twice in the New Testament.
In James 4:6-7
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
and then again in 1 Peter 5:5-6
In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.'“ Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.
The painful reality is that the root of comparison is not insecurity, it is pride. Hiding ourselves away is not fear, it is the protection of our pride.
‘God opposes the proud, but shows favour to the humble.’ Proverbs 3:34
Humility is not thinking less of yourself or more of yourself. It is thinking of yourself accurately. Knowing and understanding your part within the body of Christ and exercising your gift in the body according to the grace given to you for the benefit of one another.
Romans 12:3-8 cannot make it any clearer for us:
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.
For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.
We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.
Comparison robs the body of Christ from operating in the fullness that she is meant to, it robs the people of God their callings and gifts, and it steals from the world the opportunity to encounter God through the unique image of Himself that He has put in you.
Don’t hide from the fight against comparison.
Don’t allow yourself to be manipulated into division or hiddenness.
Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
Sometimes comparison can feels overwhelming and paralysing, here are some warrior words for you to declare should you ever find yourself lost for words.
Warrior words for the the battle
‘I will not fall for the demonic strategy of comparison. I see you for what you are, an assault against me and against the unified body of Christ. I repent for any agreements I have made with the spirit of pride and I choose to live in true humility instead.
Holy Spirit fill me so that I can operate out of a place of humble security instead of the fragile state of pride. Fill me so that I can operate in my gifts, annointings, and opportunities knowing that they come from God alone and therefore cannot be taken away.
I choose to honour those who I feel threatened by. I bless them into the fullness of God’s call on their lives. And I praise you for the gifts you have given to them.
I stand ready to put my hands to the field you have given to me.
I resist the devil and his schemes and I watch him flee. ‘
Freedom is available my friends, let’s live in the fullness of what Christ won for us.
As always I am grateful that you are all here, I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic of comparison and I look forward to connecting in the comments!
Until next time,
Love, Anna x
We are still going with our September Prayer Challenge! Coming into our final two weeks now, but it’s not too late to join and grow in prayer as a community. The linked post will give you more context for this challenge.
Don’t forget: if you are enjoying Heart & Hope, you can support by:
- Liking the post ♥️
- Sharing this post.
- Or buying me a coffee! ☕️ (one off donation)
and if you have not yet subscribed, hit the subscribe button!
Some thoughts from the week:
So true - I had something similar shown to me when I compared others testimonies and blessings with my own. God made it very clear to me, that He blessed me in the way that is right for my life and my assignment and the others in a way that is right for theirs. We all need to work in our own "fields" so that all the work is done, we can't all work in the same field, we would just be in each other's way and hinder each other.
Wow, this so hit me today. Thank you for your insight. Usually I highlight a sentence that really touched me, But there are so many juicy tidbits, I can't pick one. Be blessed and keep passing those revelations on.